She's just afraid of falling in love

The First Month

The first month was simple, but eventful all at once. We slept together for the first time and spent the night together. The first time he met my parents and the first time I spent the night with him at his friend’s house. The first time I drank with them. The first time he told me he loved me. And the first time I said it to him. The first time I really felt it, too.

                A few days after we were official, we had sex. It was nice, I could tell that he really did care for me. The next weekend, we went to his friend’s house to spend the night. This was Peter, of course, along with Miles and Joey. Of course, a few other people I’d never met showed up, so Jeremy and I went to Peter’s room and laid on his bed, away from the strangers. We sat there, and he told me that he really cared about me and didn’t want anything to happen to me. He also said that he wanted to say something to me, but was afraid that it would change things between us. But, it didn’t. Not really, and even if it did, it changed for the better.

                He told me that he loved me. I didn’t say it back, not right away anyways. It took until I was a little tipsy. We sat around while I was drunk, talking about the good and the bad. He told me that love’s good, and that we were good. Then, he asked me if I loved him. And I said yes. Joey walked in and brought us some macaroni and cheese.

                I kept going on and on about how I thought Joey had kissed Miles, although he just whispered into his ear. Jeremy thought it was hilarious though, and said “I love you, babe.” I remember looking at Joey at this point, and seeing him look at Jeremy in a strange way. It didn’t make any sense to me then, but now I understand.

                I talked to Jeremy about this, and he just said it was because Joey hadn’t really seen him in a relationship before.

                His friends liked me. And I liked them, which is much more than I can say for any of my previous relationships. I love him. So much.

                This is also the month he moved in with me. He isn’t supposed to live with me, but he does anyways. We both live in my dorm together. We sleep together and it’s amazing.

day 358: are you as addicted to tumblr as you were a year ago?

day 359: describe what you normally do on a weekly basis. A little bit about your social life outside of the internet.
My boyfriend. Hurd& Log. That is all

day 360: a picture of what you wore today

day 361: If you won the lottery, honestly, how would you spend the money?
No idea, honestly

day 362: what is the biggest lie you’ve ever told. why’d you tell it?
I love you. I thought that’s what he wanted to hear.

day 363: do you know what your first post on tumblr was?
I honestly don’t remember…

day 364: have you changed much in the past year?

day 365: look back to your first post of this challenge, asking ‘Post a picture of yourself and tell us your hopes, dreams and plans for the next 365 days’ did you achieve any of these goals? And post a picture.

Somewhat. I’m not a cold hearted bitch & I graduated with honors(:

The Beginning

                So, it all started in August, when I met the guy of my dreams. His name? Well, let’s keep that a secret for now. Or, how about made up names? Yeah, I like that one. Let’s call him… Jeremy. I like that name, not as much as the original, but I still like it.

                Back to the story now. Everything happened in August, a few days before college classes started. I met a guy named Jeremy on a Friday. He was friends with an old friend of mine and this is how we met. Now, I’m not going to say that I fell in love with him right then, because I didn’t, but there was something about him. A few of his first words were “Just so you know, I’m kind of a dick.” Of course, stubborn as I am, I didn’t believe it

                The problem with this was I almost had a thing with a guy I met, Alex (which is also just a cover name). Alex was a nice guy, but in the end, the following Monday after I met Jeremy, things didn’t work between Alex and me, so I ended it.

                I know at this point, things are kind of confusing. So let me sum it up for you. On that Friday, I met Jeremy and the following Monday, Alex and I ended it. That’s pretty much all you need to know.

                So, after Alex and I were over, I went down to see Josh (not his real name, getting the idea yet?) and Jeremy. They were down by the lake, and Jeremy was playing his guitar. I think this was the part when I started liking him, honestly. After a little while, Jeremy and I decided to go to McDonald’s and get something to eat. When we came back, we sat in the lobby for a while, until he decided to go outside.

                Unfortunately, we had to get some sleep, and we went to our separate dorms. The next day, though, my roommate invited us to watch some movies. I’m grateful for this, truly, but we aren’t at that part of the story yet. Jeremy, Josh, and I went to Jeremy’s house, where I met his mother for the first time. Later that day, we went to Jeremy’s friend’s house, where I listened to them play music together.

                Jeremy wasn’t playing guitar this time, he was playing drums. While he was doing this, I caught him looking at me, several different times. So, silly me thought he liked me. After we left Peter’s house, we went back to my room and watched a movie with my roommate and a few other people.

                Jeremy and I had my bed to ourselves, and we fell asleep half way through the movie. When we woke up, though, everyone was gone, and someone was knocking on our door. Jeremy answered it, and when he came back, we cuddled. Later, he kissed me, and eventually we went to see Josh and a few other friends, hand in hand. It was all pretty great, honestly. 

day 356: what is your dream job?
Being a neonatal nurse. I wanna help sick babies

day 357: as a kid did you want to be a ninja turtle and/or power ranger? which color?
Pink power ranger!

What kinda girl am I?
Well, let’s just start with what I’m not.. I’m not a cheerleader, or a prep. The only sport I played was soccer and that was in middle school. I’m not the kinda girl who has a lot of female friends and that’s mostly because I grew up with brothers and I’m used to how they act. I’m not artistic..
So who am I? I’m not sure I’ve figured that out quite yet. I’m good at helping people when they’re upset, hurt, or sick. I’m nice, but I don’t take any crap from anybody.
So you tell me, who am I?

Summer Love

Chapter 6:

    I woke up, sweating. My god it was hot in this room. I looked over and saw Niall next to me. Now, I know what you’re thinking and no, we didn’t have sex, we just slept in the same bed. It started raining last night, and Niall insisted that I stayed at his place. 
     I got up and went to the kitchen and made myself a bowl of cereal. It wasn’t long before Niall got up and said, “I’m hungry. Can we go and get some food?” “I just ate, Ni. Go eat some cereal.” I said. And he did, he made himself a bowl of lucky charms.
     ”Ya know, you’re a right good kisser.” He said around a mouthful of food. “Yeah, I know. I’ve been told” I said, winking at him. “So, what does this mean? You my girl now?” He asked. 
     ”I dunno, Niall. We haven’t really known each other for very long.” I said. He looked down at his now empty cereal bowl. “I guess you’re right.” He said, pretending not to be disappointed. 
     ”Listen, it’s probably best that I go home and do a few things. I’ll come back later if you’d like.” I said. “Yeah, if you don’t mind.” he said. “Alright, I’ll be back soon.” I said, grabbing my things and leaving. 
     I didn’t really have that many errands to run, but it was extremely awkward in there now, and I hated seeing Niall upset.
     Maybe I should have just said yes to him. I’d be okay with being Niall’s girlfriend. I just wanted to make sure that he really wanted that first, so that neither of us would get hurt.
      I like Niall, I really do. I just don’t know if I’m ready to be his yet. I really suck at relationships…

Anonymous said: What happened to your Niall fanfiction?

It’s still around. I think I’m gonna start writing again tomorrow, hopefully!

Anonymous said: Have you stopped doing your fanfic?

No. I plan on starting to write on the weekends again. I’ve just been super busy with college and job hunting. I’m super sorry!!

day 277: three things you miss
1 Work
2 My dogs and cats
3 School
day 278: two things you want.
1 nipple tattoos
2 Belly button piercings.

day 279: one story of a memory you have.
Uhmm.. The day before I started classes in college is the day my love and I got together. It was lovely(:

day 280: what was the last movie you watched, write about it
Bad Grandpa. It was hilarious

day 281: someone you would switch lives with for a day and why
No one.

day 282: if you were stranded on an Island, who would be with you and which limited 10 items would you two have?
Jt. Food, water, birth control, and condoms ;p

day 283: describe your perfect date
Anything Jt dreams up(:

day 284: write the differences between you and your best friend
He’s a boy and I’m a girl.

day 285: what got you into this challenge?
I saw somebody else doing a challenge, and I wanted to do one.

day 286: a picture of what you wore today

day 287: a silly picture of you/ you and your friends

day 288: last post you made on Tumblr that doesn’t involve a challenge?
Just reblogs..

day 289: write a letter to your followers
I miss you. And I’m gonna try to start writing again..

day 290: a video you would usually watch on Youtube
Anything really.

day 291: what did you eat today?
Cereal so far

day 292: recommend a few Tumblr’s and write why you recommended them.

day 293: when you look outside step outside your front door of the house, what do you see?
Other doors..

day 294: something that inspires you

day 295: things you’re looking forward to next week -month
Not much, honestly

day 296: photo?

I’m scary, I know

day 297: when did you start wearing makeup?
Hmm.. 7th or 8th grade

day 298: do you like to dress up or dress down for school
Either or. It depends on how I feel that morning.

day 299: who’s on the left of your locker who’s on the right? do you like them?
No locker! College chick!

day 300: your celebrity crush
Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Jenifer Lawrence

day 301: who is your favorite actor/actress and why?
Same as above. I love them. Duh

day 302: post a picture of your makeup from today!

day 303: last time you were sick, what did you have?
A couple weeks ago. A cold

day 304: What is your favorite kind of soup?

day 305: which grade was your favorite? why?
12th. I actually lived my life. And I had some pretty wild streaks !(;

day 306: what are the most distinct memories from preschool age and younger?
Nothing. I don’t remember too much then.

day 307: what are the memories you have when you think of kindergarten?
Just that I only had to go in the evening.

day 308: what are the memories you have from first grade?
My teacher thought I was adhd

day 309: what are the memories you have from second grade?
Brother # 2 was born

day 340: what are the memories you have from third grade?
Nothing much

day 341: what are the memories you have from forth grade?
New school!

day 342: what are the memories you have from fifth grade?
Drama club!

day 343: the last person you texted— how do you know them?
Chase. School

day 344: post a picture of yourself today

Don’t wanna!

day 345: write a letter to your best friend
Sorry she’s pregnant.

day 346: what are your favorite type of shoes? why?
Tennis shoes or flip flops, they’re comfortable

day 347: are you getting bored of this challenge?

day 348: what’s the most embarrassing thing you’ve done lately?
I was really high, and Jt was in the bathroom with me while I was pissing, and I farted!!! :(

day 349: what’s the way to win your heart?
To be nice to me. To treat me right, and try your hardest

day 350: do you have any hard, life-changing choices to make, anytime soon?
What I’m gonna major in

day 351: are you addicted to facebook?
Yuppp ! ;p

day 352: do you know anyone with an outie belly button? who?
Yeah, my Model friend Emelea (Emily)

day 353: what quote do you live by?
Smart men learn by their mistakes. Wise men learn from the mistakes of others

day 354: last time you cried, why was it?
Last night. My grandma’s sick again

day 355: honestly, do you know all the words to your countries national anthem?